How ironic it is to be in your early 30’s, a mom, and a single black woman. Some feel that it’s not normal to be single in your 30’s, and at that age you should be married. Welp! Not everyone had it easy. The dating pool now days is so trash, and not everyone is willing to just settle. I feel like social media plays a big part in so many people lives, that they make you feel you have to be in love or your miserable.
If I was to say I am focusing on self-love, then I am making up excuses because I can’t find anyone, “sarcastically” in my mellow toned voice.
Some people should realize it’s essential to remember that self-love is not a mere pit stop but a destination in itself. Taking the time to appreciate and nurture oneself lays the foundation for healthier future relationships. Single moms & single women without kids, should recognize that they are complete individuals, deserving of love and respect, both from themselves and others. But when will that time come to be loved by someone else? Who care’s, stop searching for love. Let love find you, just like you found ways to love on yourself. What’s wrong with organic love?….
Why is it so hard for people to wait until the right one comes along naturally? So you don’t have to feel forced, or feel like you are with that person just to say you have someone. I get it, I love, love. And I regret the route that I went, to try to find love. Giving my body and my soul too people who didn’t feel the same, trying to buy men, giving men reassurance without receiving it back. Knowing I am being avoided but still persisting for that male attention. I’ve been there, so I get it. I am a woman with full of emotions, full of fear, full of pain. So anything I’ve ever been through is proof of what I suffered to endure on my path of being desperate for love.
Society tends to perpetuate stereotypes about single moms, particularly those who are black. Challenging these stereotypes requires a conscious effort to redefine the narrative. But as a single woman I will stand on embracing my single status with pride and purpose, because black single moms can shatter preconceived notions and should always inspire others to do the same. No one can never take me back to that mental state where I felt I had to owe people a explanation on why I am a single mom in my 30’s. It’s my choice, my business, & my life.
Right now I am in my (preparing for future love) type of time. Because, choosing to be single for a season is not a rejection of love but a preparation for a healthier, more fulfilling relationship in the future. Taking the time to understand personal needs, desires, and boundaries ensures that the next relationship I proceed to be in, is built on a foundation of self-awareness and mutual respect.
I self taught myself that by breaking free from societal expectations, single moms can pave the way for a future filled with meaningful connections and a deep, authentic love that begins with the most important person of all “oneself.”
I hope the single girlies like myself, use this blog for inspiration, healing & growth.
XoXo Seqouia
Thriving Thirty Plus+ 
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